big time cat fancier


four missing lobster ate swallows in a dark bucket outside Safeway until a bum called them ma'am when they were clearly sir's

the NEW Josh Ritter album is AMAZING. it's called: THE HISTORICAL CONQUESTS OF JOSH RITTER. I just stole it today (sorry Josh). if you have to steal one album this week, i suggest you steal this one. and then i suggest you buy it when it comes out.

i'm sitting in my apartment listening to it. waiting for my 1 dollar pizza to come out of the oven. smelling like stale milk. my ankles are sore from work. i'm tired but i don't want to sleep. i don't work tomorrow or the next day. please hang out with me. i don't see anyone lately.

an old lady called me ma'am, today. i wanted to punch a hole through her head, but i just smiled and told her where the toilet paper was. it's on aisle 6, in case you were wondering. it sucks that i know that.

does anyone have any drugs i can take at work to keep me happy/retarded but still able to work.?

i finished reading the last Harry Potter. it was good. really good. but i don't undertand why people freak out and have seizures and cry about it. i just got to the end and was like, "that was good. good job J.K." that's it. then i went to work. not the end of the world.


  1. your heart might be made of jell-o. also: it's drugs OR jesus, not drugs AND jesus. these are the tough decisions.

  2. I tried to call you last night but you didn't answer. Probably because of all the Jesus drugs.

  3. i have one of the new josh ritter songs.

    he is playing at the britt festival. tickets are like 50 bucks though just for his show (he's playing with some singer/songwriter woman).

    take some opiates before work. it cheers you up. i used to do that when i worked at a grocery store.

  4. august called. she wants to know where your damn stories are.


  5. i have one up already.

    you should get on bryan. he doesn't his story up yet.